Tuesday, August 1, 2006

Just Croak Already !

Comandante Fidel Castro, First Secretary of the Central Committee of the Cuban Communist Party, President of the "Republic" of Cuba, Prime Minister, President of the Council of State, President of the Council of Ministers, Commander-in-Chief of the Heroic Revolutionary Armed Forces of Cuba, First Lawyer, First Taxi Driver, First Cook and Bottle-Washer, and all other Firsts, Greatests and Bests imaginable...Tyrant-in-Chief.
Oh smirk and bring out the good Champagne. Ding Dong, the Witch is dead, or if not dead, he's getting close.
And I am smirking, although I know that's not good, but in this case we can make an exception. Reason being, Gentle Reader, is that 79-year old Fidel, toast of the Hollywood Left, has had more people killed than you've had hot dinners.
The Bearded One has handed over power to Brother Raul, the long-serving Bespectacled One, who likes to wear fancier uniforms than Fidel, and calls himself a general. Are you that sure Raul's gonna give you your job back Fidel ? Maybe he's ordering the new Iranian rugs for the big offices as I write. I mean, you communists don't buy the whole God concept, so what's the problem with good-ol Raul just cranking up the classical music on Radio Havana and giving you a pillow to breathe through ?
As for you Raul, movin on up, eh guy ? A little free advice: if you want to walk in Brother's boots, you better make your bones. Order up that pillow squad pronto, then make sure Revolutionary Justice takes care of them and all Brother's other hangers-on too, before they do you first. Yeah, a dirty business, but that's the price of greatness like Fidel's. But I'm thinking you've not got the stones for it. Anyway, your time is coming too, old man. Come the day, maybe the firing squad will let you wear the general's epaulettes.
Enjoy the sickbed Fidel. And croak already.


louielouie said...

cranking up the classical music on Radio Havana and giving you a pillow to breathe through ?

been watching godfather II?

El Jefe Maximo said...

Hey, that's a great flick...one of El Jefe's all time favorites, along with Godfather I.

Raul better be a fan too, if he knows what's good for him, or he's gonna wind up like Hyman Roth.

louielouie said...


but roth has been dying from the same heart attack for the last twenty years.........

i agree make like a frog and croak.

El Jefe Maximo said...

Hmmm...you're right, I forgot that line about Hyman R.

I guess the real question is whether Raul is Michael or Fredo...

Da Godfather is such a good frame of reference for these people, as there is no essential difference between a communist party and a gangster organization.

Indigo Red said...

The real Fidel died years ago. "Fidel Castro" is a brand that cannot die. There have actually been six Fidels over the years. Interestingly, two of the most successful were women and one Fidel was a midget.

The current Fidel has also been the Jolly Green Giant, Che Guevarra, and for a week, Bill Clinton . Hillary said, " Best damn week I EVER had! What that man can do with a cigar!"