Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Green Sex: Not Just a Fetish Anymore

Okay, why am I not surprised ? A Misty Harris, in a story available on Canada.com, reports that the Greenie Wackos and adult bookstores are promoting ways to make environmentally-friendly whoopie. Greenpeace assures us, Ms. Harris says, that you can be "a bomb in bed without nuking the planet."
No, I'm not making this up. You can buy bamboo sheets, organic lubricants, visit naked vegetarian websites and wear "eco-undies." Don't forget that "sustainably harvested timber" paddles will enhance your whole experience.
Once you've quit rolling around on the floor laughing at the thought of all the wackos rolling around on the bamboo sheets using organic sex toys to save the Earth, you see that all of this makes perfect sense. As Michael Crichton and others have so presciently argued, environmentalism is in many respects a religion, and it is only natural to want to make one's sex practices congruent with one's religious beliefs.
Still, the cynic in me thinks that this exciting social trend opens whole new, profitable and enjoyable vistas of endeavor for the world's greatest scam artists -- males on the make. Just think of all the undergrads and their older cousins out there strategically studying-up on ALGORE's books and films and learning Environmentalist Wacko mantras: all in order to more frequently be da bomb in bed without nuking the planet.

5 comments:

louielouie said...

........and just what did you google to get the lead on this information........and while you pursue this information.......... i will be at this site most of the day.........

El Jefe Maximo said...

Oops. So that everything does not go to the dogs, I suppose I should mention that I saw the Green sex piece on Drudge. . .

Candidly Caroline said...

Well, bamboo sheets ARE antibacterial, and they are supposed to be great at wicking away moisture ... like sweat.

El Jefe Maximo said...

Hmmm...those are good points. . . Bungling in the Bamboo saves the Earth and gives men yet another reason/excuse to dodge their turn at changing the sheets.

Candidly Caroline said...

Ouch! I'll have to rethink that one ...